For those whom I had not wished some Christmas cheer: merry belated Christmas and happy new year! Christmas came and passed in such a jiffy! I wished it would be longer. We threw a Christmas Eve seafood steamboat supper for our youth and young adult leaders. Thankfully, mom-in-law was willing to help prepare some delicious chicken broth which made it all the more sumptous. Marketing with Michael was challenging, especially when he's excited to look at the different things offered at the stalls and we had to be careful as the floor is slippery and wet. It was the second time I get to prepare crabs for a meal and I forgot about those thorns jutting out of the claws! Baby was franctic being left to play alone as I got absorbed in preparing the food in the kitchen. Finally the crowd came to the rescue. With 4 or 5 people surrounding our little star, he decided to settle for some play and talking. But it was pay back time from mommy the day after - he virtually superglued himself to me and refused to let me leave him, even to make his meals.
We received many presents, even Michael received presents, which made it all the more exciting. Unwrapping presents now had to wait till we have recouped our energy and Mikey baby has slept. Besides a wipe and write board book, t-shirts and an angpow, this baby was given a multi activity walker with a electronic activity board that could be detached to be placed on the floor, placed in a sitting position or fixed with wheels as a walker. He was having a great time exploring the dashboard this morning. Really really grateful to Michelle and Danny for this costly gift, and for lugging it all the way from Singapore - thanks for the love!
In conjuction with Christmas, I decided to let Michael try some finely flaked cod fish (they are so expensive now adays!) but he doesn't seem to like it; preferring sweet potatoes and carrots instead. Maybe he's got a sweet tooth like me. Also starting him to eat some brown rice porridge with spinach and fish - he doesn't like it either. I'll let him try a few days more and then we'll see. He's scooting more often then crawling, many times attempting to stand. Looking at him grow, I can't stop telling myself how fast time passes - he's nearing 8 months now. Soon he'll be walking and talking. I do feel a little impatient wanting to see what he'll be like as more of his personality shows as he grows. On the other hand, I do wish time would not pass so quickly so I could savour him as he is now more. Maybe I'm afraid that I would forget how he was when he's little. To be honest, I seem to have forgotten how it was when I went into labour and then confinement. And now, a new year is just around the corner. Another new mile with changes coming my way. I'm excited!
27 Dec 2007
20 Dec 2007
first sign
I truly understand how frustrating it is not being able to get your point across, you just end up feeling annoyed. Michael grunts and throws tantrums when he couldn't get me understand what he wants. For a seven-month old, he's very expressive and assertive. We have been having battles of baby crying versus mommy trying to survive the travailing eversince day 1. The seventh month crying was much different - he expresses more clearly his particular intention and tries to communicate - just that I could not tell what he is fussing about. Every time he cries in frustration, I secretly wished beneath my seemingly cold reaction that someone should really come out with some interpreting tool that we all could afford before he wears me down - I bet it'll top Ikea as the next best seller in history.
God heard my silent prayer of desparation, really, He did. Soon, I chanced upon a book on teaching hearing babies sign language so they could use their hands to communicate before they could talk. What a great resource! It's a bit of work but I'm glad to get my hands on it. The first signs I taught myself and baby was MILK, EAT and MORE. He giggled the first few times I placed my fingers on my lips to mimic eating, later he just ignored what I was doing. I kept on signing anyway. After 2 days, Michael attempted his first signing - MILK for supper. It was his usual time for milk. When I responded with milk in a bottle, he looked very pleased and gulped down the contents with a delighted sparkle in his eye. I sensed relief and also like baby, satisfaction, that finally, we could settle some issues without going through a battle. It feels somewhat like we've advanced from savage to civilization, just because we could communicate sensibly. Really, really happy for this milestone.
God heard my silent prayer of desparation, really, He did. Soon, I chanced upon a book on teaching hearing babies sign language so they could use their hands to communicate before they could talk. What a great resource! It's a bit of work but I'm glad to get my hands on it. The first signs I taught myself and baby was MILK, EAT and MORE. He giggled the first few times I placed my fingers on my lips to mimic eating, later he just ignored what I was doing. I kept on signing anyway. After 2 days, Michael attempted his first signing - MILK for supper. It was his usual time for milk. When I responded with milk in a bottle, he looked very pleased and gulped down the contents with a delighted sparkle in his eye. I sensed relief and also like baby, satisfaction, that finally, we could settle some issues without going through a battle. It feels somewhat like we've advanced from savage to civilization, just because we could communicate sensibly. Really, really happy for this milestone.
5 Nov 2007
stationed anyone?
michael's crawling has progressed from a clumsy lunge and a quick reverse to smooth crawlies - though he tires easily, he sure does not show any signs of giving up. The floor's the favourite place now, I have to watch him whenever he approaches the edge of the mattress I have laid on the floor. He has bumped his head hard couple of times and I think he has learnt to be cautious when mummy says "careful!". No new photos yet, sorry folks.
16 Oct 2007
egg sandwich filling
I love eggs. Love egg sandwich lots. Here's how I do it:
2 large eggs hardboiled (softcore)
pinch of salt
dash of pepper
dash of mixed herbs (for an oriental twist, substitute with chopped spring onions even the bulb)
1 tabelspoon mayonnaise
Drop eggs into boiling water, cover and leave on low fire for 7 minutes. You may want to thaw the eggs from the fridge to avoid cracking the shells when they get in contact with the hot water. I don't like egg whites oozing out of the shell while the egg cooks, the water smells funny later. If you use smaller eggs, you might want to shorten the time it cooks on low fire e.g. small eggs for 3 minutes, medium eggs for 5 minutes. I like my egg yolks just about cooked, moist but not powdery - I find that they blend better.
Ready a basin of cold tap water to contain the eggs when they are cooked. Putting them in cold water helps your hands when peeling them. Squash eggs with fork, or if you prefer, chop into bits or place eggs into an egg slicer for a chunky effect. Stir in the mayo, make sure all the egg is covered with it. Add in salt, pepper and mixed herbs according to your taste. Viola! Into the bread it goes, perfect.
2 large eggs hardboiled (softcore)
pinch of salt
dash of pepper
dash of mixed herbs (for an oriental twist, substitute with chopped spring onions even the bulb)
1 tabelspoon mayonnaise
Drop eggs into boiling water, cover and leave on low fire for 7 minutes. You may want to thaw the eggs from the fridge to avoid cracking the shells when they get in contact with the hot water. I don't like egg whites oozing out of the shell while the egg cooks, the water smells funny later. If you use smaller eggs, you might want to shorten the time it cooks on low fire e.g. small eggs for 3 minutes, medium eggs for 5 minutes. I like my egg yolks just about cooked, moist but not powdery - I find that they blend better.
Ready a basin of cold tap water to contain the eggs when they are cooked. Putting them in cold water helps your hands when peeling them. Squash eggs with fork, or if you prefer, chop into bits or place eggs into an egg slicer for a chunky effect. Stir in the mayo, make sure all the egg is covered with it. Add in salt, pepper and mixed herbs according to your taste. Viola! Into the bread it goes, perfect.
small wonder
Mikey baby can now mumble sentences (well, the mumblings are now longer and in more variety of sounds) and stick his toe into his mouth. Since he is able to express himself more now, he's not letting go of any chance trying to sit up and bounce on his legs. The sense to achieve is marvelous, so should I say we underestimate what babies can do? Watching him grow, I am reminded of how a big tree can grow out of a seed, how a full grown adult develops from an infant. It really is marvelous to know how so much potential is contained, compressed and compacted within only to be unfolded in the appointed time. I thought of how these hard bones I'm feeling in him were once soft when he was still in my womb. God, You are Amazing!
migration
Dear all, Angela will be posting her future blog entries on www.angelakhew.wordpress.com, whilst photos and possibly videos will be made available on multiply. See ya and Cheers!!
29 Sept 2007
some good news at last
Finally there's news on the investigations on Nurin's death! Hopefully the police has got the right people, then we shall have rest that at least those guilty of this heinous crime has been arrested. Nurin and countless other child victims together portrays how unsafe our neighbourhood has become. I don't think I'll get to see children playing on their own even in the front of their houses from now on. Rukun Tetangga should be revived in all neighbourhoods, seriously. Once neighbours know each other, we can easily spot those that do not belong. Then again, there's no 100% foolproof method accept prayers for safety and protection. Oh God, this really is no innocent age to live in!
28 Sept 2007
she had a hand
Baby Yok Shan was highlighted in the news again, after having her lower arm amputated and leaving the hospital. This pre-matured baby had grown and put on weight, seemed to be in a picture of health, which was a relief. But the sight of the lost arm, now just a stubble danggling from her shoulder turned my heart sour. Any parent would feel the crinche deep within them at this. Who would want their children to miss a limb? My heart goes out to her, my sincere prayer that she would be strong and have the patience to accept what had happened with forgiveness. It will be depressing to grow up hating as she has many more years to be. I wish her many happiness in the Lord. For all that has happened to her, may God shower this unfortunate baby with abundant grace and mercy and restore her whole. Looking at Michael, billows of gratefulness bubbled up within me. May he grow up realising that there are those in worse predicament and may he be grateful for his.
26 Aug 2007
I did it!
It's coming close to 4 months of breast feeding. I'm so happy to have been able to press on and not give up. The first months were tough, I often wondered whether I could still go on. But baby has been growing well, he's 7kg now and interacts alot. It's all worth it. So now I am going to look forward to a 6 month target, hopefully it'll turn out well.
D-Day and after
1st May 2007. They have been waking me up every 3 hours to take my pressure reading and to check on my bleeding. I hoped they would just leave me be as it was painful for me every time they moved me. The nurse brought Michael to me at 10am. He is a delight to hold and cherish but only for 15 minutes before they had to take him back. Visitors started to crowd the room. I am grateful for friends and family being there, else the boredom would kill me.
2nd May 2007. Still couldn't get down from the bed, too weak to walk. Other moms that shared the ward with me took their turns to see their newborn in the nursery but I was stuck in bed and had to wait. I being to tell myself not to fall sick or get injured again so I can be there with baby. More visitors today, my neighbours thought that I was some dignitary or something. Just friends from church and family, I said.
3rd May 2007. Tried to be on my feet again but the journey only lasted to the toilet and I began to faint. Another blow to my plans to go home early. By then, I was missing Michael and home terribly and I requested to check out. After noon, I had Michael swaddled in a towel and was on my way home. Nothing beats the liberation of going home.
2nd May 2007. Still couldn't get down from the bed, too weak to walk. Other moms that shared the ward with me took their turns to see their newborn in the nursery but I was stuck in bed and had to wait. I being to tell myself not to fall sick or get injured again so I can be there with baby. More visitors today, my neighbours thought that I was some dignitary or something. Just friends from church and family, I said.
3rd May 2007. Tried to be on my feet again but the journey only lasted to the toilet and I began to faint. Another blow to my plans to go home early. By then, I was missing Michael and home terribly and I requested to check out. After noon, I had Michael swaddled in a towel and was on my way home. Nothing beats the liberation of going home.
the 9 months and D-Day
It has been a very very long time since I picked up the mouse and update this blog, to think of it, it has been 9 months and 40 days of another kind of cluttered days and preoccupation. What has taken such a toll of my time? I had been pregnant with my first child and had delivered the cutest boy to life in this world on April 30. I can see for real the little face I dreamt about all day long, wondering how he would look and sound like. Honestly, sometimes I still wake up feeling whether is it a dream having a baby snoozing quietly next to me. It seemed surreal at times. Funny feeling. Maybe I am still adjusting.
Being pregnant is a big thing. I thought it was not. I discovered that many assumptions I had made before being pregnant were unreal - like: it's a natural thing so I will naturally know what to do. Though God gave me the ability to conceive, pregnancy is more learning than going to school! There's so many new things as each days passes. As baby grows in me, my whole world turns upside down all for one purpose - to accommodate baby, even my work. No wonder people say baby inside you is the perfect example of a parasite, for a good cause of course. The first 3 months called for a new diet, nausea, ultrasound scanning, cramping in vitamins and milk, craving for beef burger with onions and an unmistakable tiredness. I too can't escape from the new found anxiety a mom-to-be experiences, wondering about the gender of the child. I distinctively remember dreaming of having a baby boy sitting in the front seat of the car next to me driving and talking to me, not long before my pregnancy was ascertained. Also God's gentle voice telling me it's a baby boy in answer to my prayer. There's also this sense that "yes, it's a he" in my heart. I cannot fully explain how it feels, its like since this early stage there's been a connection, a link that's like a cord of string that has tied all of me to baby. Even though medically people believe he's not considered as a person yet, I felt otherwise. Physically, he may appear to be a tiny clump of growing cells without proper human form but the connection I felt seemed to indicate that he's already whole - God made him whole and I can communicate with him. So then came the decision to name him and connect with him as much as possible. Michael, a name both Elijah and I enjoy, was given and declared over the bulging tummy everyday.
As baby grows, we were more curious as to what he would look like and what he would like to do, often talking about what life would be after he arrived. I am very thankful that my pregnancy was a non complicated one, except for a cold that got me a runny nose for 4 days and shivering uncontrollably one night. Though I was getting heavier by the month, I was still energetic to carry on my usual work and activities. However, the sleep doesn't come easy on certain nights - doctor says it's hormonal, plus the weight on my backbone makes turning over a chore and breaks the sleep. In addition, little Michael's most active at night turning, kicking, stretching his hands. I often wondered with such little sleep during the last trimester would I still have strength left for normal delivery.
Finally, due date was near. We also realised that if Michael comes out then, it would be double charge for all hospital expenses - 1st May Labour Day. So mom and dad-to-be sat down and talked to the child-in-tummy that it would be better if he could be born a day earlier or later. Soon, water broke at 4am 30th April 2007. Maybe it's me but I couldn't stop noticing that the amniotic fluid had a sweet fragrant scent - smell of little flowers was the picture in my head. I was expecting it to be ugly and had been preparing for a big gush. It was a little trickle and there was no pain, hence there was time for breakfast - dim sum to be precise; just what I wanted before I deliver my child. I checked into the hospital at 9am, without much change to my condition. I was given the drip to induce dilation and to wait for contraction to begin. Mom was right there with me, observing and helping me relax. She was a comfort and a great help. Elijah was in the room too. Knowing family members being around really settled me down. Those few hours laying on the bed I was full of anticipation yet wishing time could pass quicker as the contractions became more frequent and intense, my mouth drying up due to the moaning and breathing. Finally I was told that I was bearing down as my breathing pattern changed to rapid short breaths and was wheeled into the labour room. By then I couldn't care less of the pain, I just wanted to get over it as soon as possible.
Even knowing how to give birth doesn't come naturally. The midwife monitors the contractions and guides me to do the pushing right. Mom was walking around getting something ready, Elijah was told to stand beside me at the corner of the room. After three attempts, Michael came out as doctor capped his crown with the vacuum pump. It was a tremendous relief as all the weight and the water left me - I could have fallen asleep there if not for the stitching. Boy, he came out eyes wide open, his cry was loud and clear, but it only lasted a short while before he turned his attention to look at the new environment. Mom quickly placed him on a table and tried ways to make him cry. He did for a while again until he was placed into my arms. Too tired to take a good look at him but the sense of joy was unmistakable. I gave birth to my baby, it was a success and I did it without Epidural. Proud of it. I have conquered the fear of pain during child birth and am now enjoying the fruit of my labour. He is wonderful. Such big bright eyes.
An hour after giving birth, I had a haematomy - I ruptured a blood vessel and was bleeding. I did not know what was happening except knowing I was getting very sleepy and the wound was getting more painful. I was wheeled back to the labour room and the doctor was told to return. Mom was frantic as the bleeding was bad. She opened the stitches and released the clogged blood. I was feeling terrible by now as this was an unexpected turn of events. They collected 2 pints of blood and I was stitched up again. I just want to go home, I told myself. But I had to recover well, I still want to breastfeed my baby. Because of this episode, I missed the chance to see Michael that night. Tired, disappointed, weak, I fell asleep. What a day.
Being pregnant is a big thing. I thought it was not. I discovered that many assumptions I had made before being pregnant were unreal - like: it's a natural thing so I will naturally know what to do. Though God gave me the ability to conceive, pregnancy is more learning than going to school! There's so many new things as each days passes. As baby grows in me, my whole world turns upside down all for one purpose - to accommodate baby, even my work. No wonder people say baby inside you is the perfect example of a parasite, for a good cause of course. The first 3 months called for a new diet, nausea, ultrasound scanning, cramping in vitamins and milk, craving for beef burger with onions and an unmistakable tiredness. I too can't escape from the new found anxiety a mom-to-be experiences, wondering about the gender of the child. I distinctively remember dreaming of having a baby boy sitting in the front seat of the car next to me driving and talking to me, not long before my pregnancy was ascertained. Also God's gentle voice telling me it's a baby boy in answer to my prayer. There's also this sense that "yes, it's a he" in my heart. I cannot fully explain how it feels, its like since this early stage there's been a connection, a link that's like a cord of string that has tied all of me to baby. Even though medically people believe he's not considered as a person yet, I felt otherwise. Physically, he may appear to be a tiny clump of growing cells without proper human form but the connection I felt seemed to indicate that he's already whole - God made him whole and I can communicate with him. So then came the decision to name him and connect with him as much as possible. Michael, a name both Elijah and I enjoy, was given and declared over the bulging tummy everyday.
As baby grows, we were more curious as to what he would look like and what he would like to do, often talking about what life would be after he arrived. I am very thankful that my pregnancy was a non complicated one, except for a cold that got me a runny nose for 4 days and shivering uncontrollably one night. Though I was getting heavier by the month, I was still energetic to carry on my usual work and activities. However, the sleep doesn't come easy on certain nights - doctor says it's hormonal, plus the weight on my backbone makes turning over a chore and breaks the sleep. In addition, little Michael's most active at night turning, kicking, stretching his hands. I often wondered with such little sleep during the last trimester would I still have strength left for normal delivery.
Finally, due date was near. We also realised that if Michael comes out then, it would be double charge for all hospital expenses - 1st May Labour Day. So mom and dad-to-be sat down and talked to the child-in-tummy that it would be better if he could be born a day earlier or later. Soon, water broke at 4am 30th April 2007. Maybe it's me but I couldn't stop noticing that the amniotic fluid had a sweet fragrant scent - smell of little flowers was the picture in my head. I was expecting it to be ugly and had been preparing for a big gush. It was a little trickle and there was no pain, hence there was time for breakfast - dim sum to be precise; just what I wanted before I deliver my child. I checked into the hospital at 9am, without much change to my condition. I was given the drip to induce dilation and to wait for contraction to begin. Mom was right there with me, observing and helping me relax. She was a comfort and a great help. Elijah was in the room too. Knowing family members being around really settled me down. Those few hours laying on the bed I was full of anticipation yet wishing time could pass quicker as the contractions became more frequent and intense, my mouth drying up due to the moaning and breathing. Finally I was told that I was bearing down as my breathing pattern changed to rapid short breaths and was wheeled into the labour room. By then I couldn't care less of the pain, I just wanted to get over it as soon as possible.
Even knowing how to give birth doesn't come naturally. The midwife monitors the contractions and guides me to do the pushing right. Mom was walking around getting something ready, Elijah was told to stand beside me at the corner of the room. After three attempts, Michael came out as doctor capped his crown with the vacuum pump. It was a tremendous relief as all the weight and the water left me - I could have fallen asleep there if not for the stitching. Boy, he came out eyes wide open, his cry was loud and clear, but it only lasted a short while before he turned his attention to look at the new environment. Mom quickly placed him on a table and tried ways to make him cry. He did for a while again until he was placed into my arms. Too tired to take a good look at him but the sense of joy was unmistakable. I gave birth to my baby, it was a success and I did it without Epidural. Proud of it. I have conquered the fear of pain during child birth and am now enjoying the fruit of my labour. He is wonderful. Such big bright eyes.
An hour after giving birth, I had a haematomy - I ruptured a blood vessel and was bleeding. I did not know what was happening except knowing I was getting very sleepy and the wound was getting more painful. I was wheeled back to the labour room and the doctor was told to return. Mom was frantic as the bleeding was bad. She opened the stitches and released the clogged blood. I was feeling terrible by now as this was an unexpected turn of events. They collected 2 pints of blood and I was stitched up again. I just want to go home, I told myself. But I had to recover well, I still want to breastfeed my baby. Because of this episode, I missed the chance to see Michael that night. Tired, disappointed, weak, I fell asleep. What a day.
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