Sashimi anyone?
It has been weeks Elijah and I had been working on Kiat's wedding (his elder brother) which happened on March 25th. Having been married, the experience came in very handy. There were wedding invitations and guests lists to be organised, flowers and the place for the morning reception to be held, little details that would scream out loud on D-day should we miss them out. I was pretty happy with the progress, especially with how the wedding cards turned out elegantly - just the way I pictured it to be. Not too bad for a first time wedding planner. The highlight of the whole project was Le Tour De Malacca, we were chauffeurs and tour guides for the bride's parents - Setsuo & Yoshie Kano, later the youngest daughter Sumie joined us from Ibaraki, Japan; this being their virgin tour to our country. It took up alot of mileage from KLIA - Melaka - KL - Ipoh - KLIA. Very tiring for me personally as I was not in the pinkest of health during that stretch of time, but the fruitful rewards of friendship and understanding with the Kanos that arose from this trip bore the promise of comfort of time well spent.
It was an interesting time with the Kano family, indeed it was the first for me to personally be at close to observe Japanese relations. They are respectful and observant of culture and tradition, esteeming the value of wildlife and nature - having a farm near their house gives them more opportunity to get in touch with Mother Earth compared with the rest of us McD's generation. We are just too cooped up to pause and smell the roses. Having survived the word war, uncle Setsuo and auntie Yoshie appreciates history and was eager to visit Melaka's historical places and found themselves mesmerised with the Baba & Nyonya museum. I find myself drawn to want to know more about them as they displayed eagerness to want to know Malaysia. Their first good impression of Malaysia was the modern KLIA and the highways. Next on the list was the abundance of greens found all over places - that too because they personally prefer summer as their best season. Then comes the infinate variants of food and boy - they are an adventurous lot. I still remember the glisten in uncle Setsuo's eyes when we introduced them Ipoh's chicken kuay teow in soup at the famous Old Town Kong Heng coffeeshop. Yes, able to enjoy food is one of life's pleasures. We fed them so much, auntie Yoshie had problems fitting into her suit she planned to wear for the morning wedding reception.
It is part of being Japanese to be polite and respectful in word and in gesture. During the morning reception at Indulgence, we had speeches given over the spread of food laid attratively on the buffet counter. As the usual Malaysian food-first non-chalant small talk and private conversations brooded below the stage, the Kanos were a picture of self-constraint, pausing their appetites whenever someone takes the mic to say their word or two to the wedding couple. I respect their demeanour, they allow themselves to fully participate in the wedding, though their role is mostly as a silent spectator; had dispensed their role in full and more. To me, that is an act of giving.
I was quaintly surprised to have my photographer friend, Jim, mentioned to me how he was taken by the fact that the Kanos deeply appreciated the chinese wedding tea handed to them by the wedded couple. He noticed the difference between the way they handled and drank the tea comapred to others which is "only a ceremony, nothing much". I do agree with Jim. Our Japanese guest find meaning in the little things we do in what we call age-old tradition. I would be honoured too, when the person who drinks of the tea I hand over to drinks it with much consideration and thought. A question popped up in my mind when I reflected upon the wedding fiasco. Where is the real meaning within the wedding ceremony? Is it with the guests who turns up? Or the value of the banquet? I recalled my wedding. It wasn't the program, nor the people, though they are very important; that stands first on my list. It's the blessing from my parents, the relatives I am close to and my pastor that injected meaning into that day. Then comes the sharing of the day with friends and honoured guests. It was special day. Yes. A special day to me as family came together for a reunion, after many years having some seats empty during dinners. Friends of my parents from near and far made an effort to join their support and blessing for us. Its a powerful thing, this human touch. It makes you feel like you want to live that day again. Yes. Being alive requires us to touch life. It asks us to be humane.